In 1987, I called my parents to tell them that I was going to treatment to deal with my substance use problem. They knew that I had some struggles in that area but had never confronted me directly about it.
We didn't have the language to have such conversations back then. My mom was clearly upset by my call, but I heard a hint of hopefulness in her voice too.
She handed my dad the phone. I will never for as long as I live forget what he said to me, mostly because he hadn't really said a whole lot to me up until that point in my life.
To his credit, he knew how to find words when I most needed them. He told me that I was doing the right thing and that there was no shame in getting help for a problem.
And then, just before he handed the phone back to my mother, he said, "You have always had balls, and I know you can beat this thing." His words have stuck with me ever since, and I remind myself of them whenever I am afraid to do something that I know I have to do. People can surprise us, exactly when we need them to.