Recovering from cancer was one of the most amazing things that I ever got to do in my life. That said, I would prefer not to have to do it again.
Even several decades later, I still occasionally get seized with fear that my cancer is back. Every strange symptom or blood test result has the power to unleash my deepest fears, but I've figured out a few tricks for dealing with health scares.
First, I remind myself that none of the scares I've had since I was treated for cancer in 2005 have turned out to be cancer. The second thing I do, and just as important (hear me out, this might sound weird), is that I walk myself through what would happen if the cancer scare turned into real cancer.
How would I feel about where I'm at in my life and how I am using my time here on earth? I'm telling you, it gives me pause and reminds me that old age is not promised to us.
So, as scary as it is to think my cancer may be back, it reminds me to make the most of the life that I was spared from losing so many years ago. Making the years matter matters to me, but I have to take them one day at a time.