Part of my recovery work—in the past and into the present—is to understand where I have done harm in situations or relationships. When I first got into recovery, my first instinct was to deflect and blame everyone but myself for all the messes in my life.
After a while, I swung the other way and took ownership of and responsibility for more than what was mine to hold. I have since learned how to put situations in perspective and find appropriate balance.
I have learned that there is a fine line between figuring out what our part is in any given situation and letting people off the hook who don't deserve to be set free. Today, I find it easier to own my own part when something goes sideways in my life or if I hurt another being through words or action.
Recovery is about taking responsibility for our part in things, and I'm here for it. I remain open to examining where my actions cause harm—to myself or to others.