When I was little, there was rarely a day that went by when I didn't hear the phrase "Respect your elders." I generally heeded the warning because it was delivered as more of a threat than a suggestion. In any case, the point was made repeatedly, and I did, indeed, learn how to respect my elders.
When I got to recovery, there was some similarly clear messaging that the wonderful elder statesmen and stateswomen in the Twelve Step program that saved my life were to be respected. And for good reason.
The women (sorry, guys, it's just not usually about you with me) who came before me in recovery were initially my idols, then they became my mentors, and eventually many became my friends. Today, I am blessed to have in my recovery life and in my recovery work women whom I look up to and continue to learn from.
I am very grateful for one such old-timer (that's what people in long-term recovery are called) who has guided my daughter and me as we embarked on a new level of service, starting a nonprofit focused on women's recovery. As with all of the old-timers I have known, her wisdom was hard-won.
Her respect has been easily earned. I remember with love and respect the women who came before me or alongside me in recovery.