There is a Dr. Seuss quote that goes like this: "Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." I wish that this sentiment could be embraced by every woman in recovery, all the time, but I also understand there are power differentials that mean not all women can claim this.
As a woman in recovery from domestic violence, I was not able to be who I was or say what I felt. Today I can, and I do.
I probably gave up years of my life when I combine all the hours that I cared about what other people thought of me before I came into recovery. Today, I want the people whom I care about to think well of me, and I'm pretty sure that most do, but you know what?
If they don't, I'm okay with that too. I am not a perfect specimen of a person.
I mess up here and there, but the people who love and care about me ride those waves of imperfection with me; they don't judge or reject me. Today, I know with my entire being that I just need to be who I am, wherever I am.