In her book Soberful:Uncover a Sustainable, Fulfilling Life Free of Alcohol, my friend Veronica Valli argues that people questioning their relationship to alcohol usually ask themselves the wrong question. She suggests that instead of asking whether our drinking is bad enough to stop, we should be asking if drinking is making our lives better.
I think it's a brilliant reframe, and one that can be applied to other maladaptive behaviors as well. For example, if I were a workaholic (which I just happen to be), I can ask myself if overworking is making my life better.
It's not. Regardless of any good it does for my bank account, it negatively affects my relationships, my health, and my serenity.
I will always have to be diligent about getting "sober" from overworking. In which areas of your life can or should you ask the question "Is it making my life better?" Sometimes we need to change the question to find our answers.